Sports I Don't Get (No. 1) - Golf

Yesterday, the US team were thrashed by the Europeans... In golf! Europe's best golfers won the intercontinental Ryder Cup by a record 18 1/2 points to 9 1/2 points (whatever that means).

Cue semi-enthusiastic Mexican wave on one hand.

Excuse me if my enthusiasm isn't exactly boiling over, but I find it very hard to get excited over golf, unless the golfer happens to be Grace Park, and she's wearing something revealing. I just don't get the sport. The ball is so TINY, and yet they spend so much time knocking it over a course that could fit at least a hundred football fields or a few thousand ping-pong tables.

I also can't make sense of all the birdies, eagles, albatrosses, and hornbills that the points system has. At least in football, a goal is a goal, not a chicken.

I tried watching the sport on ESPN once, but all I saw was this - whack ball, walk, walk, walk. Polite applause from audience. Whack ball, walk, walk, walk. Polite applause from audience. Whack ball, walk, walk, walk. After two minutes of this, I switched over to Cartoon Network.

Now, if golfers were required to RUN after the ball, and whacked it like hockey players do, and try getting the ball into the little hole with as few strokes as possible WITHOUT letting the ball stop rolling, THEN you've got yourself a sport.

That way, you'll have the same principles of golf, but with added excitement, and more people besides those actually rich enough to afford gold club memberships might actually get interested in it (Heck, it would be worth watching just to see Tiger Woods fall in the lake while trying to stop his ball from rolling in).

Oh well, enough about golf. I hereby declare golf as the first sport on my list of 'SPORTS I DON'T GET'. Now, excuse me while I go back to watching Johnny Bravo reruns.